My friend Staygold asked me this:

Do tell me why you think Nam is being all cutesy with YY – The couple key chain, the secret hideout invite, the bunny slippers and what not! This man had a loving wife who he made feel lonely (her words, of course) Why do you think he couldn’t do the same with his ex wife? I am still not able to process his sudden transformation into a cute guy!

I’m answering here because the response box is a pain-in-the-ass to work with. — oops, sorry.

 

Let me qualify my answers, Staygold.

I’m not going to explain the SUDDENNESS of the transformation because the speed and pacing might have something to do with time constraints of the drama. This is already the 12th episode and we only have four more episodes (or two weeks) to wrap up everything. There’s simply not much time to show a GRADUAL transformation. The tempo of the story has to accelerate in order for the story to cover much grounds before the final episode.

All I can explain is the CREDIBILITY of the transformation. For me, the change in character must be plausible.

I always think that if people understood and foresaw the consequences of their bad actions and bad habits in terms of life-and-death, then they would put an immediate and complete end to these actions and habits.

For instance, if a smoker could feel the excruciating pain caused by lung cancer, he would immediately stop smoking.  If an alcoholic could fast-forward his life and see the moment of his family’s death due to his drunk-driving, he would immediately pour all the bottles down the drain. So yes, I believe that there are times when people change and transform themselves in a blink of an eye, and these transformations sometimes involve tough decisions with life-and-death consequences.

Anyway, to proceed…

CW didn’t love the ex.

He grew up with her and she seemed to have adored him since they were young. 20 years, plus 2 years married she said. He’s what? 36?

He might have confused love — because of her puppy-worship and his need for security. He lost his family twice.

I liked the way CW closed that chapter of his life — with firmness and finality.  He said,

“I don’t regret marrying you. I’m sorry for making you lonely all those years. And thank you for caring about someone like me. But that is all that I feel toward you….Do you remember what you said to me when we married? (let’s be happy together) But let’s be happy separately now.”

He had moved on.

As I understood the script, the catalysts for him to free himself from his previous state of  loneliness were threefold.

One was the advice of the VP samchoom. He told CW to stop making it difficult for himself and to let go of the past. He told CW to pursue what he really wanted. “Just do it” as Nike slogan said. Don’t overthink it.

The second catalyst was the mug. It said “Whatever it is you want, you will be able to get it.”

Remember? When he told YY that he was a “loser,” he truly believed that. He blamed himself for the deaths of his family and his uncle. In his mind, he killed them. That’s why he still had nightmares with those ladies at the funeral home whispering that he was a bad person who “caused” death to his family. He internalized everything.

He believed that he could NOT keep the people he loved safe. In fact, he brought them harm. He was like “bad juju” or bad luck — just like what those old mean ladies said.

So for him, it was better to shut out everybody and not love anyone so he could injure no one. That’s what the VP samchoon told him in the first episode. That he was good at avoiding and preventing things. CW did become an expert in preventing bad things because he avoided contact with anything. He chose to be alone — and lonely.

Now, do you also understand why he “overreacted” when he bumped YY in the rain? He didn’t want to accept her refusal. He insisted on bringing her to the hospital so she could  have herself checked. He panicked because he thought – here I go again! I’m really a bad luck. I’m going to kill this one, too.

Her gift made him rethink that.

The mug represented a reassurance, an encouragement and a promise all in one. It was kinda like a talisman to ward off evil. She was forcing him to think:  “Nope! You can have a good life. It is possible for you to keep your people safe. You’ll be okay. You can have your happy ending, and keep it. You can love someone and she won’t die, too, or suffer for your love.”

An aside: Do you see how the conflict in episode 12 relate to his “curse”?  In CW’s mind now, his love for YY caused the bad director to focus on and target YY for revenge.

Her appearance in his life taught him that he could kick away bad luck. lol. That was what she did, remember? He bumped her but she stood up and started to run off. She didn’t want his attention despite her injury. She was in a hurry, and when he tried to detain her, she simply kicked him so they’d be “equal.”

That was YY’s approach. She was tenacious and she was a go-getter. Like, when she grabbed his hand and said she wouldn’t let him go. He actually liked her bitch-move. She wouldn’t disappear and leave him lonely.

More importantly, she wasn’t someone who’d die easily on him.  And the cactus gift reminded him of that, too. The cactus could survive and withstand anything.

The third catalyst was the realization and the FEAR that he could lose YY because of his inaction.

Remember? He was unsettled that whole day in the office. He was missing her. YY’s brother had informed him that she was going on a date. Later that evening when she called up to apologize for interfering and to tell him he could do whatever he wanted, he took her words to mean that she was cutting him loose. Meaning, he was about to lose her. And that fear of losing her was — funnily enough — greater than his fear of causing her harm.

That’s why he rushed to get from the date. He didn’t want to lose her. He was finally convinced by his Uncle’s words and YY’s confidence in him, as written on the mug, that he wasn’t cursed and he, too, had a shot to happiness IF he went after it. And that was what he did.

However, we saw him hesitating in Episode 9, because he realized that he’d overlooked YY’s feelings. HE had already made up his mind – and he said, he didn’t kiss on impulse – but he wasn’t sure that YY had made up her mind.

So he forced himself to slow down for her.

When he figured out that his feelings were reciprocated in Episode 10, he could finally enjoy all the romantic things and engage in these cheesy BF things. He probably read about them in his comic books or heard about them from TV dramas and dismissed them as futile, especially for him.

Also, he kept notes of quotations in his logbook, didn’t he? To me, that says the he was essentially a dreamer.  He kept notes of things he wanted to do…if he could.

YY changed all of that by giving him confidence and hope that life wouldn’t be cruel to him again. And since she was at his side, constant and steadfast, he could begin, not only to dream of things, but to actually indulge in doing those things.

When you think about it, SHE was his superhero.

(lol. He was hugging her. She probably didn’t know that he was clinging to her like this, like he wouldn’t let her go, because she had just rescued him.)

So for me, his transformation made sense. Every episode since Episode 6, when he asked her to “stay with him” showed his progression. I think he was attracted to her from early on. Probably when they met at the vending machine and told her that she wasn’t his type and asked her if she was “hitting on him.” lol.

That’s usually a sign of attraction to me: projection. He was projecting his unconscious and unwanted feelings of attraction onto her as a defense mechanism.

Anyway, here are my notes, if you want them, about the progression of his change in feelings for her.

Episode 6: “Stay with me,” getting her a “couple” yogurt (lol), then giving her the necklace. Even back then, he was doing cheesy things, like buying her a necklace because the “forum” advised him, too. –what  kind of forum was that anyway? A dating forum??

Episode 7: Fighting for her!!  Fighting her boss, her ex-boyfriend, Yul who wanted to steal her away from him, her intruder/brother home from the military service, and her mother. He wouldn’t have gone through so much trouble if he disliked her. When she came tumbling into the restaurant, he knew he wanted to “trust in her.” Meaning, he wanted to trust that she would stick with him no matter what.

Episode 8: …but he didn’t want to trust YY again after the film clip.  The ironic thing here is that when HE didn’t want to trust in her, she actually proved that she was INDEED trustworthy. Because despite him trying to get rid of her, she clung to him like glue and begged him 1) trust in her and 2) not to leave her house. When he realized that she was leaving him, he chased her in the restaurant.

Episode 9: Awkwardness after the kiss, and he had to let her know that he did it out of sincerity, not on impulse. He resented the “boss, teacher, dad” argument.

Episode 10: Letting his guard down in his drunken state, finally admitting that he was bothered by her ex, and pleading with her not to leave him and turn him into a fool like her ex (who’s begging to return to him). Told her to stick to him like a glue. See the theme of “losing” and “sticking on”

Episode 11: Encountering his ex and being gently pressured by VP samchoon to return to ex-

Episode 12: Saying final goodbye to ex. Firmly establishing his commitment to her. Mother however lobs his kryptonite: don’t mess up YY’s life

Gotta run. So… you DID understand why I had to get that butt post out of the way? It was a distraction. His tushy was certainly nice to look at, but it got in the way of my romance appreciation.