I think your post went through, @Fern. I can’t find it in my pending inbox.
grace
Is it episode 14 or 15? The almost too intimate scene…why did CMD want to remove her prosthetic leg?
I understand that this was the trigger for her outburst.
ZJ also, if she knew that she wasn’t ready she shouldn’t have initiated it.
Then again, it was ZJ’s mother who triggered her, put her down and her r/s with CMD, made ZJ feel that she didn’t deserved to be loved by a normal person. 😢
ZJ:
“It’s as if everyone has agreed that a girl like me should deserve someone with a physical disability. That’s the reality. But my mother taught me to teach reality a lesson. If I am excellent enough my disability is no longer a problem.
So I live harder than anyone else. I want to take control of everything. I want to choose someone instead of letting someone else choose me. I thought it.”
She goes on to talk about her the rejection she felt with her first bf when he saw her leg.
CMD:
“Zhuang Jie, I’ve thought it through. Friends, lovers, or sweetheart. Anything is fine by me. I can be with you forever. Because it is you, I can.”
GrowingBeautifully (GB)
Hi @grace!
Yes, it was Episode 15. ZJ’s mum really uses tough love a lot. She bases her mothering on how she was mothered, also in a tough way. And I guess we have to add to that her feeling of a lack of confidence in how to deal with 3 children of rather different ages, who know ‘more than her’ in terms of the modern world and schooling. Her way of compensating is rather unfortunate but understandable. She seemed to me, to often start off from a position of anger and by being reactionary.
I like that Zhuang Yan stepped up to speak with ZJ and has become more mature in how he has observed and analysed Mum’s state of mind. He has become more understanding and accepting of Mum’s idiosyncrasies and her overbearing tactics.
I was surprised by how ZJ took her discontent out first on the guy who touched her on the dance floor and then on CMD. She was spoiling for a fight, actually dragging a chair over to bash it over the guy if CMD had not stopped her. It was as if she had to prove something to herself or her Mum. When thinking of a place to watch the countdown, she actually suggested going to her home to fight it out with her Mum. She brought that extra fighting spirit with her and CMD asked why she was so strange.
It was her turn to be domineering and forceful, but it fell apart because, as you say, she wasn’t ready.
I felt bad for CMD who was just going along with her. With him, once again she brings up that she’s being frivolous, which means she was still harking back to when she was angry with him. Her aim was to fight and to win in a fight, not to improve their relationship.
I thought he was pretty tolerant when he didn’t cut her off completely for her treatment of him. In fact he brings her home in a most responsible manner before he breaks up with her.
grace
Yeah! CMD is the steady one over here. He is gentlemanly and tolerant. I can’t imagine how slighted and rejected he felt from what she did and said to him. That he forced her 😱 that was so wrong. And yet he was able to put his hurt aside and send her home. No mean words on his side.
People are angry with ZJ’s reaction. And yes she shouldn’t have lashed out at him. And she was wrong about changing her mind so easily.
Yet in a way I liked that they have portrayed them with complex emotions that sometimes make you feel uncomfortable and angry at them. It is in a way realistic because sometimes we don’t know what we want, do dumb things that we regret.
Of course ZJ’s responses to CMD, her clinging on to him and yet running away, are a result of her insecurities. She wants to be loved yet isn’t confident enough to trust that he loves her more than she wants to be loved.
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I think your post went through, @Fern. I can’t find it in my pending inbox.
Is it episode 14 or 15? The almost too intimate scene…why did CMD want to remove her prosthetic leg?
I understand that this was the trigger for her outburst.
ZJ also, if she knew that she wasn’t ready she shouldn’t have initiated it.
Then again, it was ZJ’s mother who triggered her, put her down and her r/s with CMD, made ZJ feel that she didn’t deserved to be loved by a normal person. 😢
ZJ:
“It’s as if everyone has agreed that a girl like me should deserve someone with a physical disability. That’s the reality. But my mother taught me to teach reality a lesson. If I am excellent enough my disability is no longer a problem.
So I live harder than anyone else. I want to take control of everything. I want to choose someone instead of letting someone else choose me. I thought it.”
She goes on to talk about her the rejection she felt with her first bf when he saw her leg.
CMD:
“Zhuang Jie, I’ve thought it through. Friends, lovers, or sweetheart. Anything is fine by me. I can be with you forever. Because it is you, I can.”
Hi @grace!
Yes, it was Episode 15. ZJ’s mum really uses tough love a lot. She bases her mothering on how she was mothered, also in a tough way. And I guess we have to add to that her feeling of a lack of confidence in how to deal with 3 children of rather different ages, who know ‘more than her’ in terms of the modern world and schooling. Her way of compensating is rather unfortunate but understandable. She seemed to me, to often start off from a position of anger and by being reactionary.
I like that Zhuang Yan stepped up to speak with ZJ and has become more mature in how he has observed and analysed Mum’s state of mind. He has become more understanding and accepting of Mum’s idiosyncrasies and her overbearing tactics.
I was surprised by how ZJ took her discontent out first on the guy who touched her on the dance floor and then on CMD. She was spoiling for a fight, actually dragging a chair over to bash it over the guy if CMD had not stopped her. It was as if she had to prove something to herself or her Mum. When thinking of a place to watch the countdown, she actually suggested going to her home to fight it out with her Mum. She brought that extra fighting spirit with her and CMD asked why she was so strange.
It was her turn to be domineering and forceful, but it fell apart because, as you say, she wasn’t ready.
I felt bad for CMD who was just going along with her. With him, once again she brings up that she’s being frivolous, which means she was still harking back to when she was angry with him. Her aim was to fight and to win in a fight, not to improve their relationship.
I thought he was pretty tolerant when he didn’t cut her off completely for her treatment of him. In fact he brings her home in a most responsible manner before he breaks up with her.
Yeah! CMD is the steady one over here. He is gentlemanly and tolerant. I can’t imagine how slighted and rejected he felt from what she did and said to him. That he forced her 😱 that was so wrong. And yet he was able to put his hurt aside and send her home. No mean words on his side.
People are angry with ZJ’s reaction. And yes she shouldn’t have lashed out at him. And she was wrong about changing her mind so easily.
Yet in a way I liked that they have portrayed them with complex emotions that sometimes make you feel uncomfortable and angry at them. It is in a way realistic because sometimes we don’t know what we want, do dumb things that we regret.
Of course ZJ’s responses to CMD, her clinging on to him and yet running away, are a result of her insecurities. She wants to be loved yet isn’t confident enough to trust that he loves her more than she wants to be loved.