The thread is now open.
Of all the kdramas I’m watching this week, this is the only show where the couple should have a serious conversation (preferably with a counselor) before any talk of long-term commitment.
This is a dose of reality, because this is a Bitch’s blog, and we need to be grounded.
There are some impressionable teenagers lurking here who might think that this sort of behavior is cool simply because the adults in the room (like me!) are coo-ing and ooh-ing at the sweet romance.
Look: we must learn to discern between real life and kdrama. In kdrama, all these saccharine moments are tolerable. But if you emulate what you see in Kdrama to your real life, without discernment or caution, then you’re going to get yourself in trouble.
As I said before, looking mature and acting mature “sometimes,” don’t cut it. The facts are:
Jun is 18 years old, an adolescent.
He suffered a traumatic experience.
He ran away.
He’s a high school dropout.
He has family issues.
He barely had time to explore what he really wants, and to know who he is, when the tragic death of his friend occurred.
Science says that brain development is not complete until the age of 25.
Same with intellectual, emotional, behavioral and social maturity. Age 25 is when maturation is reached.
People change, taste changes. What he likes and admires at age 18 will be different when he reaches 24 or 30.
This age, from 18 to 25, is the time of the most dynamic growth and development.
High school graduates have more career opportunities, higher earning potential, lower unemployment, and better social mobility than high school dropouts. Plus, they’re less likely to be involved in crime and drugs.
Love doesn’t really conquer all, unfortunately.
Now, I’m copy-and-pasting an article from another site, The Spruce.com/Premarriage-Question. It has a long list of pre-marital questions that Rara and Jun should discuss, if they were real people, in real life. It’s rather disconcerting when you realize that they haven’t even touched on a single important issue, i.e., relative goals, personal habits, spiritual beliefs, finances, children, family, sex, and conflict-resolution. We’re more than halfway through the drama, but we’re still stuck in fantasy-land. 🙂
Please read through the questions, as prepared by Sheri Stritof. Remember that in real life, you would want to go through questions like these with your boyfriend/fiancé before deciding to settle down long-term.
source: https://www.thespruce.com/premarriage-questions-list-2303597
Important Premarital Counseling Questions
Written by Sheri Stritof
Updated 10/02/19The success or failure of your marriage relationship depends on how well you handle several personal issues. From the relationship itself to financial decisions, children, and sex, you both must know what to expect.
A marriage is a commitment between two people that may have differing views on certain issues. Numerous research studies over the years have proven that talking about these things before your wedding day can significantly affect the success of a marriage. That’s why premarital counseling often involves some very common, but important, questions that dive into the heart of a healthy marriage.
By knowing what your partner expects from your life together, you will be better prepared to handle these situations as your relationship grows. It’s a good idea to review these questions with your partner.
Relationship Goals
These first questions may be the most important. If you don’t know why you’re getting married or have different views of where you’ll be in a few decades, it could cause problems down the road. Ask yourselves:Why are we getting married?
What do we as a couple want out of life?
Do you think our relationship will change after we are married?
What do you think we’ll be doing in 30 or 40 years?
How would you describe yourself?
How do you think I see you?Personal Habits
If you have not lived with your partner before marriage, sharing a home can be surprising. Sometimes it’s the seemingly insignificant things that can get under your skin and cause bigger problems than expected. Think about:Do you think it is important to know one another’s physical and mental health histories?
How often do you drink?
Have you ever hit someone?
Do you have a criminal record?
Will you clean the toilet?
How are we going to divide up the household chores?Spiritual Beliefs
While religion and spiritual beliefs may be taboo topics for polite society, they can play a big role in your marriage. Consider these questions:Does religion play an important part in your life?
Do you think faith and spirituality are important in a marriage?
What is your image of God?Finances
Money can cause a lot of stress in a family, and studies show that finances are one of the leading causes of divorce. You don’t necessarily have to agree on everything, and maybe one of you is better at certain aspects of it than others. As a partnership, dealing with your financial future together and understanding short-and long-term goals is a wise move. Think about these issues:Can we talk about money?
Are you a saver or spender when it comes to money?
How much do we owe in debts and what are our assets?
Do you want to have a budget?
What are our financial goals?
Should we have a joint checking account, separate accounts, or both?
Who is going to be responsible for making sure the bills are paid on time?
Do you consider going to the movies and having a vacation every year a necessity or a luxury?
Do you have any outstanding fines or debts?
What are our plans for purchasing a home?
Do we both know where our important financial documents are located?Children
Not every couple wants to have kids, but it’s a good idea to keep an open dialogue about it. These questions lay a foundation for continuing this conversation later:Do you want to have children?
Do we want to have children?
If we decide we do, how many children do you want to have?
How long should we be married before having children?
What kind of parent do you think you will be?
What is your parenting philosophy?
Will one of us stay home after we have children?
What type of birth control should we use if we want to postpone or prevent parenthood?
How do you feel about adoption?
Do you have any children already?Family
Every family is different, so understanding how your future spouse grew up and their relationship with parents and siblings today will be very helpful. After all, you’re each marrying into a new family, so it’s best to try and understand them. Talk about:What was your childhood like?
Was your family an affectionate one?
Do you think we will have problems with your family during the holidays?
What family values do you want to bring family into our marriage?
What do you like and dislike about your family?
What do you like and dislike about my family?
What do you like and dislike about your parents’ marriage?
What do you like and dislike about my parents’ marriage?
How much time will we spend with our in-laws?Sex and Intimacy
No relationship can survive on sex alone, and intimacy is just as important. While you might think you know a lot about your partner’s views on either, it’s wise to have a serious conversation about it before marriage.Also, some of these questions get into topics like jealousy, loyalty, and self-esteem. As a supportive partner, you’ll find them to be beneficial reminders for what your spouse may be going through emotionally. Consider these questions about physical intimacy:
Can we talk about sex?
Should we talk about sex?
Are you comfortable discussing your sexual likes and dislikes?
What are your expectations of our sexual relationship?
Am I a jealous person?
Do I have trust issues or feel insecure?
How important are affirmations to me?
Do I handle compliments well?
What is your love language?
Do you think we listen to one another well?
Do you think it is important to be faithful to one another?
How do you want to spend our days off?
What are your expectations about how we will spend our free time?
Do you believe that we should be doing everything together?
Can we each pursue our interests?
Do you need time alone?
How would you feel if I want a night out with my friends now and then?
How will we make sure we have quality time together?Conflict and Communication
You’ve probably heard that communication is key to a good marriage, and it’s true. Your life together will be filled with important decisions, trying times, and some conflict. It’s a natural part of spending your life with another person. You can start it off right by talking about how you’ll handle these situations when they come up:How will we make decisions together?
Are we both willing to face difficult areas or do we try to avoid conflict?
Do you think we have problems in our relationship that we need to deal with before the wedding?
Do we handle conflict well?
How are we different?
Do you think our differences will create problems in our marriage?
Do you expect or want me to change?
Can we both forgive?
Are we both willing to work on our communication skills and to share intimately with each other?source: https://www.thespruce.com/premarriage-questions-list-2303597
Enjoy the show!
Thanks for the new thread Queen! 🙇🏻♀️
That’s a lot of questions but yes they are very important.
I saw this on Instagram, looks like there’s a time jump already? It looks like Grandpa Kim is ready to play his Maiden’s prayer. ☺️
https://www.instagram.com/p/CHb0Hxig3Zg/?igshid=11gq2e7xu6m0d
Thank you @packmule3 and @agdr03 for the link.
Oh, the thought of all those real-life questions in terms of our possible OTP fills me with trepidation.
I think that RaRa looks more mature in the pic you showed @agdr03. I wonder if she will stop wearing her grownup children’s wardrobe. I think it must have meant to show her childlike outlook? It emphasised that sometimes Jun seemed older than her.
Didn’t you have any marriage preparation class? 🙂
I’m not an expert on the Catholic Church canon laws but *I think* marriage preparation (it’s called “Engaged Encounter” and Pre-Cana) is mandatory here in the US if you want to be married in the Catholic Church.
My hubby and I went to an overnight session, and we also had THE great big talk with the priest. We didn’t have “issues” because we were relatively older than most couples and have already discussed many of items prior to the session (e.g., finances and children). So we went through our set of questionnaire quickly.
But I still remember the ambiance of the whole seminar as “grim.”
Break-ups are known to happen after those Engaged Encounters because the couple realize that they have irreconcilable differences.
But better a break-up than a divorce, right?
Yes. I would like a time jump please.
🙂
I should have added a tagline for those questions, right, Fern? Something like, “…because life comes at you fast.”
I had to put in the reminders, because I’ve seen comments (no, not on this blog, but elsewhere) that made me wonder if this kdrama is wrongly setting up its young viewers to believe that it’s all hunky-dory to be gloriously, passionately, fervently, crazily, romantically in love at 18.
#SorryNotSorry. But being a bitch that I am, I’ve to burst some bubbles.
@packmule3 and other commentors, It looks like the writer/s are hedging by exposing Jun’s age and RaRa’s shock with more plot ahead because of the problematic age difference. One cannot deny that Jun is a minor and no matter how immature RaRa is, their age status has to be addressed. Frankly I’m glad true love is not running smoothly. Am thinking about the creepy teacher seduces student dramas and the headlines in real life-and we know how well those go.
K Dramas also have some history of those inconvenient relationships. For example, watch My Little Bride-with lots of cringe-worthy moments. In that drama it was the man who was older than the girl. And for arguments sake, doesn’t that always seem to be presented as so much more acceptable. Double standard, eh. I can’t count the many movies and tv shows where the female lead was someone practically out of her teens (if not still in her teens) and the male lead was almost elderly. Why no problem there?
Isn’t it a double standard, though, to criticize the age difference between Jun and Ra Ra (which is supposed to be five years) when you argued earlier this year (Feb. 20, 2020 post–http://bitchesoverdramas.com/2020/02/20/throwback-thursday-goblin-on-appreciating-euntak/) that we should overlook the age difference between Eun-Tak and Goblin because she is so “mature”? [An age difference of 900+ years(!)–though he presented as a 39-year-old man.]
Like ET, Jun is also 19 and a high school senior—and is mature and self-sufficient. So what’s the difference? Is it because young men are less mature than young women? Or because ET and Goblin were supposedly destined to be together? (One could argue that destiny seemed to play a hand in RR and Jun getting together as well–the recital pic, the wedding, the car accident, etc.).
BethB
No. Two entirely different things.
Science says that females mature faster than males. They hit puberty earlier. Four years earlier, if I remember the studies correctly. An 18 year old female would be more mature than an 18 year old male. All things considered.
Also, the social expectations on females demand that they become “socialized” earlier. Women are expected to play by the rules of a patriarchal society so the rules of conduct are drilled into them early, like bearing children, respect for in-laws, be an obedient housewife, cook meals for family and extended family, keep household stores, manage household helpers, earn money if husband’s in low economic class, work in field if an agrarian society, and so on.
Also women’s brains are wired differently. Studies show that we have more neural connectors so we think faster and control our impulses better. That’s important: controlling impulses. Studies show that more teenage boys commit juvenile delinquency than teenage girls.
Do you get it? Women mature faster than men.
Even in the context of the drama storylines themselves, the goblin girl is more mature than Jun.
The fact that Jun ran away and thought that was a good idea to show his rebellion already demonstrated his lack of maturity. Only a kid would think that was a responsible and adult way to solve problems. He needs to grow up.
Good thing you brought this up. I agree that Jun and Rara need to have an extensive conversation. Although grandpa Kim was right that Rara knows who Jun is deep down, there are still important issues they need to discuss. Premarital counselling is something I’m definitely for.
Even though we only had a month time skip Rara is already looking older/more mature with her style.
Also I really liked Jun’s look as the young Man Bok, I think it’s the fact that his hair is away from his face- I can see his full face, his eyebrows are striking.
So sweet of Rara to transpose “The Maiden’s Prayer” to a different key, just to make it easier for Mr. Kim to play it.
Howdy! 😊
Yes, Hubby and I did those marriage preparation classes. We had 1 with a councillor and one with the Parish Priest. I think if I were to think about the answers to those questions now, I won’t get married. 😆
I don’t know, I was 27 and hubby was 31, I thought we were ‘mature’ already but hmm 🤔 😁
Can’t wait to watch the episode. ☺️
Thanks for this @packmule. Agree they will need to talk and work through many many things, and all that puppy love and sweetness isn’t enough to carry a relationship through. Also, Jun is still trying to run away, but I think Rara’s going to break up with him in the upcoming Ep, so he’s going to have to deal with the issues at home eventually. Rara has definitely been forced to grow up in this one month because she doesn’t have Jun to do everything for her. Her hair is now straight (which I find suits her much better), her dressing less kiddy, and she planned the recital and cleaned up after.
I was wondering if Rara’s story was written to contrast against Jun’s. Rara submitted to her dad’s wishes and studied piano and music (even though she struggled at times to learn), and only quit playing after she had graduated. Perhaps her example might be what encourages Jun to hang in there and finish his studies.
One of my fav aspects of this show has to be Grandpa’s love story, and how the 2 leads are acting it out! (I agree with you @Esst3, he looks good as Man Bok, seeing his too-long fringe almost poking his eyes as Jun makes me feel like borrowing Ms Jin’s scissors to snip some of it off) And it’s another foreshadowing: Grandpa’s letting go of Sunja thinking the other guy was better for her might be hinting at Rara letting go of Jun, or maybe Jun might do the same in the future, if DDSSLLS turns up?
Speaking of which, did the whole story about the body and the watch make sense to you all? It didn’t to me. We only hear the details from Director Chu, who has been more or less the worst investigator I’ve ever seen. Also, who murders a thief for stealing your watch, then dumps the body while still wearing your watch???
Director Chu is such a softie. He was the first to stand and applaud at the recital, with tears in his eyes. He’s been dressed in matchy clothes with Ms Jin this Ep, both at the hospital visit, as well as during the recital. I can’t wait for him to learn piano haha!
Lol KBS just posted a shocker on IG: https://www.instagram.com/p/CHeugiigJTz/?igshid=1j94x3gp0ijbx
@JT7 omgosh that’s a shocker indeed 🤯🤣
Yes Jun is still a minor, he and RaRa has never had a deep and meaningful conversation about their relationship.
Hahaha. That woke me up JT7. 😂 Are they trolling us?
She marries him?! @agdr03 is going to have a fit!
Actually, I don’t mind it, especially if he turns out to be DDSSLLS and if they’re getting married because he’s dying anyway. Might be some platonic arrangement to protect Rara and make her inherit his assets.
Also, Dr. Cha can help her fight the crooked Secretary and get her own inheritance. Jun can’t.
Yes, I agree, JT7. That whole dead body and watch mystery was disappointing. So lame. Was it just a plot device to make Jun’s mom come over to Eunpo?
😒
And what did Dr. Cha mean when he gave her those delphiniums? I just checked. Those flowers meant openness to new experiences. Was he hinting that he’s the new “horizon”?
Penguin_07, Jun and Rara had a few serious moments, like when he talked about his friend’s death. Those moments indicate that they’re compatible. But compatibility of temperament is just one component for a happy marriage. Maturity is a big one. Same with goals in life. Sigh. What will we do with this problem named Jun? 😂
JT7, I agree. She looks better this way. She fixed her hair and changed her fashion style to fit her age, didn’t she?
@packmule3 the problem name Jun? Time skip 😂 Rara will probably let him go in the next ep and if they’re like Mr Kim love story they will one day meet again (time skip 😆)
Time skip: yes.
But we better be prepared for Jun turning into angry, resentful, and BITTER man. lol. I hope he uses the time wisely to become a doctor, architect, or something, rather than a social miscreant.
My thoughts exactly about Jun turning into a bitter man 😂 thinking it’s unfair and hating life but yes hope he uses that time to mature and study hard to become a successful man.
Ha, @packmule3, my husband and I didn’t have a pre-Cana class because until just before we married, he didn’t know that in fact he had been baptised Catholic. He probably spent his youth badgering his BF whose family was practicing.
I see a lot of valid points in the discussion above. I believe that Korean dramas do present an optimistic view of young love, particularly the trope of the childhood friend or crush who forms the other side of the OTP.
I believe 18 year olds (and younger) *will* fall madly and unreasonably in love even without the influence of any dramas because hormones and reason aren’t always compatible. Also a teen often might not comprehend that life is long and there are many options and experiences to consider before committing to one other a la Romeo and Juliette.
In Jun’s case, I assume that he had no wise and confidential adult close, like the Grandpa, to confide in. His mother presented herself as an icy and perfect socialite. His father seemed controlling and potentially abusive to both. I disagree with running away unless it is to survive. I think we’ll get more background into Jun’s family. Hopefully they aren’t terminally disfunctional.
Lol @packmule, I’m hoping they are just trolling us once again. They have trolled us so many times already, this could just be either Rara or Jun having a nightmare and KBS is just milking it? I’m hoping doc reconciles with the ex wife actually. She does seem to care for him and she keeps turning up in Eunpo lol. Then she can join the TWD and advise them that divorce isn’t as great as it seems to be. 😅
Given that we’ve been trolled over and over, the secretary may just turn out to be a good guy. 😆 And yes if the body and watch were just meant to alert the police and bring mum to Eunpo it would be so lame! They could have just had Director call mum to alert her. I still think there’s more to it, seeing how many scenes they’ve devoted to showing the watch and well dressed man.
The problem called Jun? I agree with @penguin_07 a time leap would be most helpful, but with a time of separation laced with hope. Even if Rara chooses to break up with Jun now, I am hoping she will be able to do it in a way that will encourage Jun to hang in there. Rara has the ability to be honest yet kind (like in the way she turned down Doc’s advances), and hopefully she will use that to help Jun move on. They do have Grandpa’s guidance and his story to help them along, and that would remind them that love sometimes means letting go and patiently waiting.
I thought @ JT7 raised a good point that Rara’s family life presented a nice contrast to Jun.
Her father doted on her, so did her piano teacher…in her own strict way.
So although she disliked playing the piano as a child, or had little natural talent for it, she grew to love it because of the loving atmosphere she grew up in. Her ultimate act of rebellion was playing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star at her graduation recital. But her father still supported her.
And then she quit afterwards. Even her decision to quit wasn’t opposed by her father.
With Jun, he had been an obedient child up until his shouting match with his father. He lost it then and ran away.
He once told Rara that her piano-playing days were part of her because they were her memories. If so, does this mean that Jun’s dysfunctional family life is also indelibly part of him because that comprised his own memories?
Do you see what I’m getting at? If Rara is a gentle, loving and upbeat person because of the love that she received since she was child, then what does that make of Jun, who was raised by an impossible mother, and an even more impossible father? Is he damaged goods then?
Part of growing up, of maturity, is learning to accept the cards one is dealt with. Rara learned this at an early age. She was forced to play piano that she didn’t like. She couldn’t paint her nails. She was expected to play — I forgot, was it Mozart?? — at her recital. She went through with it because it was expected of her. After she accomplished the expectations, she moved on to her next stage in life. Her DDSSLLS. She may look and act whimsical, but I think her approach to life — meet life’s big challenges with a good nice sleep and a happy face the following day — is mature.
That hasn’t been the case for Jun. To me, Jun is immature. He may look mature, and we may think that he acts mature because he takes on these assorted part-time jobs to live on his own. (lol. I was going to call out the drama writer for romanticising this part-time thing. Nobody in SKorea really wants to survive doing multiple part-time jobs.)
But he’s really still a kid in the way he deals with life’s problems.
It’s interesting to see whether the older audience who’ve raised children will view this drama from different lenses from younger audience who think that “Romeo and Juliet” is such a romantic story, instead of a tragic story.
Also, Jun can’t forever blame his family life (and neither should we use this as an excuse) for his failure to grow up later on — should there be a time skip. He needs to grow up.
Noooo. I don’t want Dr. Cha’s Ex. At first, I wanted Mrs. Jin (?) the hair salon ahjumma to be his wife but I guess she’s being paired with that detective. He can just be an old bachelor like Grandpa Kim, and treat everybody to expensive dinners every payday.
He can be bitter for an episode. (Don’t you want to see this actor with a brooding face?? hahaha)
This is a romcom so we all know it’s going to end happily anyway for Jun and Dalmi.
Jun can’t end up anything less than successful. There’s no way he’s going to end up as jobless druggie with a beer belly.
BTW, when his tutor came over to speak with his mom, I was reminded of that hit drama about children with over-ambitious parents, “Sky Castle.” Hmmm… I would love to see that drama pairing again: Kim Hye Yoon and Lee Jae Wook. LJW didn’t get her in “Extraordinary You.”
Lol or doc can adopt Jae min as his godson and spend his days playing duets with the little guy. 😆 Hubs remarked to me that for a surgeon Doc is remarkably free. 😏
Rara described herself as a resilient weed once, didn’t she? Guess the love she received helped her to grow deep roots. Whereas Jun, he didn’t have any of that. So his solution is to run away whenever things get problematic, and I agree that that is a sign of immaturity. In his desperation to get to Rara he even left his friend SK to take the fall out. Poor guy was so terrified!
But to his credit, I think Jun is slowly learning to man up. He did initially consider running even from Rara when things were heating up. He admitted to Rara that that was what he usually did: run away. But in the end he chose to stay. Yes, it was mainly because it WAS Rara… but I thought this was also a small step for him in the growth dept. Hopefully, the breakup would be a catalyst for more growth.
Has anyone caught Ep 12 yet? I’ve just picked up my jaw off the floor. I didn’t like how marriage is being treated so lightly here. The episode was actually doing very well, Jun stopped running away, Rara grew up, her letter to Jun was sincere and kind. Doc’s confession was respectful and nice. Then the last part happened and it’s like “what on earth was the writer thinking???”
Huh? It wasn’t a dream sequence??? We weren’t being trolled??
I’ll watch when I get home.
Ok wait. I think they trolled us AGAIN. Oh GOSH! 🤣🤣🤣 And they even trolled Jun too. Oh my head! Initially I was so shocked because the wedding just happened out of nowhere, then I thought it was true and got angry hahaha.
I went back to look at the wedding. It looked legit, but it might be part of HY and SK’s promo for their biz. The wedding announcement was made on social media on a wedding biz (Joyful weddings) site, not on Doc’s personal account. And the first comment on the post was made by HY. Then when Jun crashed the wedding, HY and SK actually looked upset, like their plans were ruined. Doc didn’t look devastated, and Grandpa actually chuckled. Also, I don’t think Grandpa can officiate weddings?
Oh gosh, this show!
@JT7
Just watched ep 12..I don’t think they really married. Maybe it has something to do with Seunggi and ha young business plan
I wish it’s the case..if they really married then I’ll be disappointed
@Anis yes I think its part of the biz plan. One of the ahjummas also mentioned she loved planning weddings. They were probably doing this to promote HY/SK’s biz. This show is so good at trolling us!
@packmule you mentioned Extraordinary You. They referenced the show in this episode. The bandaged patient in room 205 that Jun mistakenly thought was Rara was called Eun Dan-O.
Lol to the reference to Extraordinary you @JT7!! you are so sharp!
Anyway I feel there should be a time leap, Jun referenced that when he is 40yo, she will be 45yo and at that age, the difference isn’t as stark. Just like how Grandpa’s story hints to us on the idea of waiting, although they broke up before finding each other again at a chance encounter.
Meanwhile I still find at 18yo, I agree with @pm3 that he is still immature….at least based on brain science. Maybe there are exceptions…in the olden days people marry young, though the age gap is the other way round. I want to see Jun grow before he can properly say he ask for Rara’s hand in marriage.
Plus what is going to happen for the next 4 episodes…I feel like we have reached a certain climax in their story, or maybe I am wrong. I think the dead body episode need to be resolved.
So my mum and I were so confused about the wedding. She was so sure it was a dream when I showed her the post. She’ll be glad to know we were just being trolled😂
On the topic of trolling, I feel like we are being trolled with the time skips- 1 month, 6 months… the writer knows everyone is waiting for it.
And yes what happen to the dead body and even Rara’s father’s secretary. I thought the stalker’s storyline was kinda weak at the end.
Ha. I was laughing about the wedding because it looks like a huge misunderstanding. RaRa’s expression seems more incredulous than horrified, cross or chagrined as it might if the wedding was real. I think @JT7 called it correctly.
Jun taking RaRa by the hand and leaving the church reminded me of the time he picked her up at the hospital and took her away from Dr Cha. Grandpa Kim sure had a big smile.
I liked that just as Mr Kim and his wife had a special song ‘Maiden’s Prayer’, so also do Jun and RaRa with ‘Plaisir d’Amour’. I rather think that Elvis’s version’s lyrics may win in the end.
Oh, and the pretty girl at the end—a blind date for Jun?
True!
Maiden’s Prayer for the Grandpa Kim.
Plaisir d’Amour/Elvis Presley’s Can’t Help Falling in Love With You for Jun.
The blind girl for Jun doesn’t look bad. 😂
@Fern: Yes! I had the same thoughts. Rara and Jun also have the welcome home song. HY and SK have The Road to Me. The girl in the teaser is pretty! Guess Jun’s mum will try to set him up with some respectable girl to prevent him from trying to marry Rara?
@Esst3: Writer probably anticipated the shockwaves that resulted from the earlier reveal about Jun’s age, and would be trying to give us the time leap everyone wants. The jump puts us at the least in end Feb/early March (Meeting with DDSSLLS was 22 July + 7++ months). Jun has about 2 more months to go before he hits the age of majority.
The dates and seasons don’t seem to correspond though? The so called wedding between Doc and Rara would have been in end Feb, which would be in winter. Wouldn’t it be too cold for Rara to be running around at the beach in just the wedding gown? Jun said he couldn’t wait for winter to come so he could officially date Rara, perhaps this was taken out of context in the teaser and was something he said earlier. Was he waiting for his exams to be over, or for his birthday? Jun is growing up: He’s stopped running, he’s taking responsibilities for his studies, he understood why Rara broke up with him and was willing to wait.
The wedding has to be fake, otherwise it makes Jun out to be a wife snatcher, no matter how heroic he looked running to get Rara. I think the show was trying to parallel and contrast the 2 weddings, how the actions of the ex and Jun were so different.
I thought Doc’s “confession” was lovely. Sincere, yet respectful. He didn’t deny that he was DDSSLLS, but he also didn’t outrightly confirm that he was DDSSLLS either, so there’s still a possibility it is someone else? The teaser did mention something about the owner of a second hand piano store, as well as Rara being really happy (I am still wondering if it’s dad). Did Rara send all those messages to DDSSLLS via PM or did she just post publicly on her account like she did previously? If it was the latter, doc could have read them even if he wasn’t DDSSLLS.
Yes, @JT7, I also saw that Doc neither agreed nor denied that he was ddsslls. If not, why would he continue to do that?
If the piano came from a second hand store, it still could be Jun. The cost/payments would be less. But why his surprise at the time of the delivery? Maybe the 2nd hand instrument shop made a substitution?
Does anyone wonder if the goon/director was actually in the special forces as he said? I wonder if he was ‘embellishing’ for his audience.😊
In the comments for Stand Up, there has been a thread on Team Geek vs. Team Good Boy. I’m wondering if we might start a thread on Team Jun vs. Team Dr. Cha?
After the last episode (with the staged wedding), I’ve decided I’m leaning towards Team Dr. Cha. Maybe it’s simply because I am tired of this actor (Kim Joo-Hun) always being a second lead who rarely even gets the (SL) girl (so far of the three dramas I’ve watched him in, only in IOTNBO has he won someone’s heart, but it was with an extreme amount of resistance on her part). I’d also like to see the SL male actually win the FL for once in a k-drama!
Dr. Cha is handsome, kind, has learned to enjoy life since leaving his old life behind, has a good job, is divorced like Ra Ra and, most importantly, finds her delightful (I think she could get on a lot of people’s nerves). In Jun’s absence, Ra Ra seems to have lost her joy–perhaps Dr. Cha could help her find it again.
Jun needs to go through his youth without having the responsibility of Ra Ra. He needs to be a kid. I mistakenly thought he was mature enough for a relationship with Ra Ra in the earlier episodes, because he was so competent and responsible, but seeing him back in his home setting, I realized how young he is. He and Ra Ra can be good, lifelong friends who can look back on their time together as a transitional time in their lives, in which they were both catalysts for change. They don’t have to be romantic partners now or later.
However, my hunch is that Jun and Ra Ra will be together in the end, in the distant future when they happen to meet again, on the street somewhere (stopping to listen to someone playing Plaisir d’Amour on the piano). If that happens, I hope that Ra Ra will have learned to live independently and to earn a living (beyond having a couple of piano students a month!).
@snowflower for you: https://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=xUDuzj7H_0U
Seems like the welcome home song was composed for the show.
Random side note: Friend is telling me there’s speculation that Jun was next to Rara when she was ordering her drink, the day stalker filched her wallet. You can see a split second glimpse of what might be him, with specs. Might explain why he had that look on his face when she walked past him during the recital. As well as the look of horror when he found Rara’s stolen student ID in the stalker’s office because he would have realized the stalker had been stalking Rara for the longest time.
@BethB I’m still on Team Jun. Doc feels more like a older brother/father figure to her. But I do hope he does find love and happiness. I agree Jun needs time to enjoy his youth, but I wonder how much of that will happen even without him dating Rara, it looks like he’s being pushed to study all the time and then take over his dad’s position. But yes, a period of separation, to forge their own paths, and find their direction in life would be good for both of them.
@JT7, good observation about the seasons, but I guess because filming only started from this summer they can’t film for winter. Probably should have made the time skip longer so it’s spring.
@BethB I don’t think there was every a moment of doubt about who the endgame was for Rara. As much as I think the doc is a great person and agrees with what you say about his person, I don’t think he’s a better fit for Rara than (a grown) Jun. Rara and Jun just fit in a way I can’t explain lol. For example although the doctor hasn’t done anything to make Rara uncomfortable but she’s just naturally been more comfortable with Jun even before she really knew him. With Jun she has a carefree and shameless nature that she doesn’t have with the Doc. I agree with JT7, Doc is more of a mentor/older brother. Even if she did date him I think it will be the same as her ex- where she thought he was pleasant enough so she was willing to marry him.
You’re right in saying that both Rara and Jun need to be apart and grow as individuals. That I see, Rara needs to learn to be truly independent and Jun needs to grow older.
Thank you, @JT7! I am listening to the piece now and trying to figure it by ear.
Hi, One of the things I hate about Jun’s parents and that I’ve noticed in a lot of KmDramas is the insistence that the child go into the family business-here medicine-when the child has no interest in or aptitude for that profession. Jun is an interesting character because he has so many talents and interests-he can buld things, grow things, play musical instruments and we know he likes mathematics. You can see how suffocating his parents are when you see how controlling they are. This seems to be a K Drama trope for anyone in the upper classes (although in Parasite, the mom saw talent where there was none). Even RaRa’s beloved father seemed tobe steering her toward piano(perhaps music is a proper gurl’s ocvupation), although after her senior recital she stated that she’d never play again. So in some ways, based on controlling parents (Jun’s being more malignant and RaRa’s Dad almost killing her with kindness), makes the Jun/RaRa pairing (apart from the sticky difference in their age)more appropriate. They, in some way, complete each other-She’s avdebtor, he’s her creditor; he’s wary, she’s trusting; they both are kind and sentimental. And they have helped each other with personal growth. I like Dr. Cha
but guven the way he treats Ra Ra with indulgenge, it seems to me that he’d just be like her Dad emotionally.
I love the connections between the Seoul familes-those who attended the graduation recital, the hospital group(jun’s parents, raRa’s ex and family, Dr, Cha-friend to RaRa’s ex, worked in same hospital as Jun’s family, and Dr. cha’s ex. And also think that the interaction between the Seoul people and the small town people is so much fun. Imlove the ahjummas who are a funnier version of a Greek chorus.
I just watched a YouTube lecture about K Dramas sponsored by the Korea Society of New York featuring Professor Michelle Cho from the University of Toronto. It was very informative and touched on fans’ chatrooms and influence over drama productions, especially ehen the dramas are still in production. Many changes in dramas are related to these fan discussions and their metrics. At times, thebprofessor indicated that when known fan reaction is taken into consideration, drama plots and endings canbecome muddled because they change the writers’ intentions. If you can, Bitches, check it out on YouTube. I couldn’t help but think about our Hospital Playlist discussions. However, I think the writer here is immune to such things.
Please stay safe during the CIVID surges. Watching K Dramas and other programming keeps us outbof health trouble.
@JT7, the pianist who performs 20 Fingers is Kim So Hyung. She is probably the stand-in for Go Ara. Kim So Hyung was also music supervisor and performer on the OST for Secret love Affair. I don’t know who is the composer for this piece, but the style does remind me of Secret Love Affair, so I am wondering if it is the same composer. The composer for Secret love Affair is Lee Nam Yoon.
Do you have the link for the kdrama lecture on YT, @Old American Lady?
Thanks!
@snowflower You are right, it should be Lee Nam Yoon, if I’m reading the Korean characters correctly here: https://www.instagram.com/p/CHdNDMQL1Pf/?igshid=1x9gxjp8kczm2
@oldamericanlady: It might be an asian thing actually, where the child (usually the oldest son) is expected to take over the family business. And yes, would love the link to the lecture, definitely makes sense that the plot gets muddled if it’s changed along the way to suit what the fans like.
A perfect example of a plot getting muddled is “A Poem a Day.” The director admitted to changing the plot ending halfway through the filming. He even apologized to the lead actor, Jang Dongyoon, who was a relative newcomer that time. It was his first lead.
The director changed it due to the sheer number of $#$@#$ fangirls crushing on the other actor and demanding that he be the endgame.
The story was lopsided as a result of the 180 degree switcheroo, and there was no build-up to the ahjussi-and-niece romance.
You could actually tell when the director decided to change the direction. He made the main hero get into a fight with a … motorcycle. (hero obviously lost, lol)
What the heck??
Awesome @Snow Flower!
I cried three times during these two episodes.
First was when Grandpa Kim played his Maiden’s Prayer, second was when Rara was talking to HY’s Mom about returning things/person and last was when she broke up with Jun, left him at the park.
You’re right, Dr Cha is a good person. I liked his conversation with RaRa and how his grateful that she gave him that relief from his burnout just by playing Twinkle Twinkle. ☺️
Jun still needs to sort his family issues.
I want the time jump really bad too.
TWD ahjumma’s are still hilarious! 😄
To All, Just want to say that we seem to be conditioned to accepting age difference where the man is considerably older than the woman/many times girl and where the girl is a minor. The man is viewed generally as more sophisticated and acts as a teacher to awaken the girl to womanhood. From a feminist point of view, the patriarchy is controlling. When the woman is older, cringe seems to rule. Even in popular Noona dramas there is always shame-even when the Noona is the likes of Son Ye Jin.And the noonas somehow become ahjummas. In so many the discomfort is palpable. That’s where I see the double standard, always to the detriment of women, even where there are “happy” endings. And in many societies child brides are common-probably related to fertility. They don’t like old eggs.
In our story I think the major problem is that Jun is a minor. Otherwise, I think he and RaRa are well matched. They seem to complete each other. The two both need to mature on some levels. I’ll argue that well into the 1960’s and even now in western societies, people marry right out of high school. And in former times, the divorce rate was low. So please bring on the time jump. I am pulling for the RaRa and Jun connection.
.