Just six points (the seventh is self-explanatory).
1. Kim TaeHee is an ER doctor.
Surprise. Surprise.
To me, there are four noteworthy things from the opening scene.
a. That way TaeHee clutched his arm while he was performing CPR was odd. I don’t think he broke his arm because his arm looked fine when he went to the wake.
b. The little boy, Kim Junho died on Oct 9, 2020. The following day, Oct 10, was the first day and DongJoo’s first day at work.
c. There’s a considerable age gap between Kim Taehee (age 30) and Kim Junho (age 10).
d. Kim Junho and family didn’t live far from the funeral director. The director casually remarked that they could’ve passed by each other on an ordinary day. Since DongJoo lived in the area, I wouldn’t be surprised if she and TaeHee had crossed paths, too.
e. I think the stigma attached to funeral directors is visible in the size of the badges they wore.
Look at the size of the medical ID that TaeHee wore. It announces that he’s a doctor in the “Emergency Medicine” Department.
In contrast, DongJoo’s discreet label pin has the words “Funeral Director” in even smaller letters.
The way I see it, Taehee was required to come in close contact with the dead because of his training. Surely, he worked with cadavers in medical school. But while the general public view Taehee and the members of his profession with much respect and awe, the same general public stigmatize funeral directors and view them with prejudice for their contact with the deceased.
2. So what does DongJoo’s job as a funeral director entail?
I get that she orchestrates the funeral arrangement from the wake to the transport to cemetery.
But the drama isn’t quite clear what she actually does in that special room. That is, is she also embalmer? An embalmer removes the blood and other bodily fluids in the dead person’s body and replaces it with preservative and disinfecting chemicals.
Or is she just a mortuary cosmetologist? She applies cosmetics to give the deceased a natural, peaceful look.
Or is she also a mortician, dressing the dead and beautifying the coffin?
To me, the best way to get rid of the stigma attached to funeral directors is to educate people about their work. By showing the public what happens behind-the-scenes, the public will get to see that there’s nothing dirty, gross, strange, or shameful about the professional service that funeral directors do.
3. The title, “Misunderstanding and Prejudice,” is apt for this episode.
The daughter-in-law was full of concern and solicitude towards DongJoo. At one point, she served DongJoo food at the wake. When DongJoo refused, her supervisor came and sat down to partake of the meal.
DongJoo: Is this okay? This is my first time.
Supervisor: This is rare. Usually people don’t know who we are until the funeral admission.
DongJoo: Right.
But as it turns out, daughter-in-law was hiding her prejudice behind that outwardly demonstration of kindness. I think that a) she had a radar on DongJoo’s every movement and whereabout to avoid her, and b) she was compensating for her negative feelings towards DongJoo by treating her nicely.
In contrast to the daughter-in-law, TaeHee appeared to be intent on getting DongJoo fired. From DongJoo’s standpoint, he was hovering around her and her workplace because he wanted to report her infraction to her supervisor. She had no way of knowing that TaeHee was merely trying to intercept her resignation.
TaeHee: DongJoo will tell you that she will quit.
Supervisor: She will?
TaeHee: It’s my fault. I had a misunderstanding and made a mistake. It’s hard to tell you in detail. Please tell her she can’t quit because it’s my fault.
Supervisor: I don’t understand anything you’re saying, TaeHee.
TaeHee: It’s all my fault. (bowing) I apologize, sir.
Supervisor: Why are you apologizing to me? I don’t know what happened between you two. If you made a mistake, you should apologize to DongJoo.
TaeHee: (silengt)
Supervisor: Have you ever sincerely apologized before? I don’t think you should be here.
And then, he went in search of her to apologize.
In short then, the daughter-in-law was prejudiced against DongJoo – perhaps out of ignorance, and perhaps out of meanness.
But DongJoo misunderstood TaeHee. She mistook his intentions and believed that he sought to have her fired from her job. She wasn’t to know that TaeHee already had ample time to reflect on his wrongful preconceived opinion of her (or prejudice) and wanted to correct their misunderstanding.
4. Director’s misdirection
Warning: the director of this kdrama likes misdirection. Like, when DongJoo was on the phone with the police officer HaeAhn, and a man began following her.
HaeAhn: (yapping) Please tell me your address. I’ll head right over.
DongJoo: (nervously) I’m at HoGok 2nd street.
HaeAhn: What? Hold up. I’m right there.
DongJoo: (steps quickening) Oh, really? Where, exactly?
HaeAhn: (stops and sees something) Wait.
DongJoo: (anxiously) Where are you?
HaeAhn: …
DongJoo fully expected the man to pounce on her. I don’t know if she was more shocked that the man was a false alarm or that TaeHee appeared in front of her.
TaeHee: I’m sorry, chagiya. You must’ve been surprised.
Awww. He pretended to be her boyfriend.
TaeHee: Who were you talking to on the phone? I couldn’t reach you.
TaeHee stared at the departing back of the man who followed DongJoo. I’m not sure if that man will have a role in future episodes, but I’m glad that TaeHee is willing to play a protective boyfriend to ward him off.
Meanwhile, on another street, HaeAhn rounded up a couple of high school kids.
Sigh. He totally forgot about DongJoo.
We, the audience, were expecting HaeAhn to come flying to DongJoo’s rescue, so having TaeHee come out of nowhere made their surprise encounter all the more thrilling. I don’t mind this kind of misdirection.
5. Convincing DongJoo to come back home
TaeHee: Well. I was nearby. I saw you when I was passing by.
DongJoo: (giving him the silent treatment)
TaeHee: I’m serious. I’m just passing by. Really.
I doubt he was just passing by. He’d been roaming the streets, looking for her.
They arrived at their dorm.
TaeHee: Pack you stuff and come down.
DongJoo: (just looks at him)
She was probably thinking that he had the audacity to order her around.
TaeHee: You aren’t staying here, are you? You should move somewhere else.
DongJoo: (continuing to just look at him)
Normally, I dislike the silent treatment because a) it’s passive-aggressive, and b) it doesn’t help the situation. But in this situation, I understand why DongJoo wasn’t talking to him. TaeHee hadn’t apologized yet, and he simply assumed that she was going to give in to him.
But she obeyed. When she turned back to look at him at the door, he gave her an encouraging smile.
Her silent treatment continued at the bus stop. He knew that he was still in the doghouse.
TaeHee: Where are you headed?
DongJoo: (pretending to be interested in her phone)
TaeHee: Let’s go. The room is still empty.
DongJoo: (finally talking to him) Am I someone you can just kick out and invite back in?
TaeHee: I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.
DongJoo: (waits for him to continue)
TaeHee: I misunderstood.
DongJoo: What?
She then received a text from her supervisor ordering her to report to work the next day. She knew then that her supervisor didn’t accept her resignation and realized that TaeHee didn’t tattle on her.
DongJoo: Uhm. What did you tell my team leader?
TaeHee: What? Well…that you’d work really hard.
DongJoo: What the…?
TaeHee: The bus is arriving.
He was saved by the bell…errr…the bus. He stood up and grabbed her luggage. I thought this was cute. He knew that nothing was resolved between them, but if he held on to her suitcases, he couldn’t lose her.
TaeHee: Let’s go. We’ll have to wait if we miss this one. You’ll catch a cold here.
DongJoo: (just stares at him)
TaeHee: Hurry. Hurry. You have to go to work tomorrow. Hurry. Hurry. Get on.
And he hauled her two suitcases on the bus. He left her no choice but to follow him.
In effect, he was holding her suitcases hostage. Lol.
I like this whole moment because it shows TaeHee learning how to extricate himself out of trouble without pathetic groveling. Though he was awkward, he was winning her over with his boyish charm.
For me, too, I prefer this awkwardness to a grand apology. The way I see it, it would’ve been easier for him to just go down on his knees and shout, “I’m sorrryyyy!” But in real life, emotions aren’t that dramatic. In real life, people tend to waver, get cold feet, and conceal different feelings in a tangled mix. So…
when TaeHee urged her to come home AND dragged her luggage with him, he was covering up how difficult it actually was for him to own up to his mistake. Instead of SAYING sorry, he was hoping that his actions would slowly convey her of his sincere apology and desire to make amends.
6. TaeHee’s change of heart
DongJoo: Why did you go to the Incheon Bridge?
TaeHee: Because I keep thinking about…
DongJoo: Thinking about what…
TaeHee: I heard you couldn’t hear because of me. I had to go.
I’m glad that he admitted to her that she weighed on his mind. This wasn’t the first time, though. Remember when he made a u-turn on his motorbike and returned to her side as the chief mourner in Kim Junho’s funeral? Back then he said that he met a weird woman and that he was screwed.
There was something about DongJoo that compelled him to literally go out of his way to help her.
7. Holding her hand
No explanation necessary.
🙂
Thank you, @packmule3. I like how both of the protagonists are changing to accept each other. I’ve semi-binge watched through episode 6 now. I’m feeling a bit dehydrated.
When Tae-hee was clutching his arm in the ER, I first thought that it was the arm that was burned, but it is his left arm that has a burn on the wrist. (The burn that made Dong-Joo think he was certainly that taxi driver’s son, and which gave him away despite the bear suit) I guess we’ll have to wait to see what the problem was with his right arm and why the boy said Tae-hee killed him. Poor little ghost thinks he’s been killed by the doc and abandoned by the funeral director.
I suspect that Dong-Joo isn’t an embalmer – she would need a lot of training to do that. An embalmer would wear scrubs or similar and we haven’t seen her in that sort of clothing. There has been another director who says things like, ‘she or he is ready for you now’, which makes me think that she takes care of the final cosmetic side of things as well as ‘front of house’ things. Also, the deceased people are wearing their funeral clothing by the time she sees them. (As an aside, I was wondering if embalming was routinely done in Korea since cremation seems to be the norm and there isn’t an open casket viewing, except for the closest relations.)
Annyeong,
i am loving this show. and too bad my binging ends and i’m now caught up. waaah
anyhoo, yes i can’t believe TH is an ER doctor. for him to completely leave that profession is so sad. i wonder if he’ll go back? i’m so glad he’s healing well… now that he and DJ are hanging out more now. i feel like he’s becoming normal. i was cracking up when they woke up in one bed the morning after – when he encouraged her not to be a chicken haha.
i was also fooled by the daughter in law. only to find that she is like the ex-bf. ugh! so happy that TH was there for her – reminding her that she has pretty hands and great hands. awwww. so sweet. never realized the stigma behind people who work with cadavers. i’m sure it’s not easy to work with dead people. i wouldn’t want to have that profession. but just another reminder that just like the garbage man, somebody’s gotta do the dirty job. and i hope they get good pay. just like gardeners.
but yes, i liked how he grabbed her by the hand and led her out. only, she wants to be alone.
good point on how TH struggled to apologize to DJ. he made the effort to wait for her to get off work and take her back home to 202 via bus. i also liked it when he picked her up in his Moped and how he had to take her arms so she can wrap it around him. cute.
so i wonder if there’s a back story to why the cop neighbor hates rainy days.
i missed the part where TH used the word CHAGIYA when DJ was being followed by a mysterious man. yes, pretending to be her boyfriend. sweet as honey haha.
@HK Lady, I was fooled by the daughter-in-law, too. I only saw what I wanted to: that a member of the public was appreciative. But we saw the recollections of how she always pulled her hands away quickly. I thought it was rather splendidly mean that TH put the flower on top of the pizza box. Touché, Tae-hee!
@packmule3, good call on Tae-hee’s medical background in your first post!
Speaking of misunderstandings, was Dong-joo away from the funeral job for over a year? I think I missed that detail and thought it was for a few weeks or months. The little boy Jun-ho was her first deceased project. We learned that Tae-hee went straight into the military at that time, so it would be about 1.5 years before he was out again. But it makes sense as well because the numbers show that Dong-joo has only worked with a few deceased people as the current era starts. It’s interesting that she was re-hired at the same place. I wonder if the priest had a hand in that.
I don’t know if little Jun-ho was related to Tae-Hee or perhaps he was a well-known neighbour. He definitely lived in a different address from the compound that the uncle lives in. I have the impression that Tae-Hee’s parents live away from that location because they phone rather than stop by. Tae-Hee may have stayed with his uncle while he worked at the hospital which seems to be the nearest one. Jun-ho’s death was described as an accident by the doctors and by the uncle when he was speaking to Tae-hee’s mother. Jun-ho’s ghost told Dong-joo that he left his ring at the market. Was he running back, not paying attention to traffic and he got hit by a car, possibly driven by Tae-hee? Is that a reason that Tae-hee works diligently as a crossing guard?
The actress who plays So-ra played the mendacious So-yi in Alchemy of Souls and the Young Seo’s OTT and competitive cousin. She has a really wide range and does well imo.
hi everyone. i hope you were all doing great. looks like i will end my JOMO streak with this drama since i watched that botched drama called Hospital Playlist. this seems interesting.
about the question on who’s doing what work regarding funerals, i think FL’s scope of work, aside from being a funeral director, she’s also a mortician. i remember watching a korean movie with the title ‘My Girl And I’, where ML’s family operates the sole funeral parlor in their town and his grandpa is the mortician and there’s a scene where the grandpa is shown, sort of doing the work, in a different manner.
@Fern,
👍
Yes, it did take DongJoo a year to decide to return to the funeral job. The child Junho died in 2020. It was written on the form that her Team Leader was reading, “2020.10.9.”
And on the urn in the columbarium IIRC.
Thanks for clearing that up. 🙂
@GMPL, thank you for clarifying what a mortician does in Korea. The job titles and duties may be different from what other parts of the world know as well, since customs differ. I don’t even know that much about who does what in where I live in the U.K.
I found this article, which I think is interesting. More South Korean women are pursuing careers as funeral directors these days.
https://www.reuters.com/article/southkorea-jobs-women/women-handling-the-dead-more-female-morticians-in-south-korea-as-taboo-fades-idUSKBN27Y05O
my pleasure, @Fern. it’s true that funeral preparations vary from country to country. for example here in the Philippines, if the preparations are being done in a funeral home, mostly, the embalmer is also the mortician. i actually have a relative who is a manager at a funeral home, but she’s also a licensed embalmer because of the paperworks needed as part of funeral arrangements.
@Welmaris, thank you for that video. It’s very informative. I don’t think we have heard that Dong-joo took any sort of advanced training, so I don’t think she does the embalming side of things. @GMPL, I think it’s probably common for an embalmer to be a mortician or funeral director, but perhaps all funeral directors aren’t embalmers?
In the UK, unless I’m misreading, there is a preliminary course to take. This assesses an applicant’s aptitude, explains various roles in the profession, explains grief and counselling, explains Code of Practice and Code of Standards, etc. Once the preliminary 6-hour course is passed, one can go on to a certificate course or a diploma/degree course. An embalming course is separate as far as I can see. Of course, a funeral director who has higher qualifications and has been trained to embalm will have a better chance to get a job if there is competition. In the UK a viewing of the deceased is rare and over 75% opt for cremation due to lack of ground space for burial. Cremation isn’t done at the funeral home, but at a separate facility, so embalming is getting less common.
Wikipedia says: “South Korea had the cremation rate of 92.1% in 2022. It is increasing as people born later are more likely to be cremated. About 94 percent of those under the age of 60 were cremated, with 99 percent of those in their 20s being cremated in 2014.[9]” I can’t find anything about embalming in South Korea. I think it exists, but perhaps only for public figures who might have a viewing?
Here is an interesting Guardian interview of a woman embalmer in New Jersey. https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2013/oct/24/embalmer-for-14-years-ask-me-anything . Some states require all funeral directors to be able to embalm; others have a separate licence.
@packmule, thanks for your question about Dong-Joo’s job role. I’ve learned a lot.
it’s quite opposite, actually @Fern. funeral directors/managers here can be embalmers and morticians as long as they have the necessary requirements/certification. on the other hand, only embalmers/morticians with a college degree are qualified to be funeral directors.
Dong-joo’s workplace, as the name implies ‘Eonju University Hospital Funeral Home’, are they working within hospital premises? and are they considered employees of the hospital’s corporation? i don’t think they’re subcontracted though.
@GMPL, yes, in Korea there are funeral homes within hospitals, if k-dramas are accurate. A quick google showed that ‘most’ funerals in South Korea are held in funeral facilities in hospitals.
Annyeong 🍂
i am enlightened by the further reading/discussion regarding the time jump since the boy died (soul#1) coz i was wondering about the elapsed time…
and also what morticians do. or the rate of cremation in Korea. me and my Bestie were talking about death and with how expensive funerals are now – we’re both leaning toward cremation because apparently, you can’t die without costing you an arm and a leg as well. loco moco.
my dad donated his body for science and i think my mom is leaning towards that as well. before retirement, they have arranged their prepaid burial plans. after retirement, things changed for my parents.
my thoughts exactly, @HK_Lady. sometimes, it’s not just funeral service employees that are prejudiced or misunderstood, even people who are buying service premiums and the sales agents take a hit too. some people get the idea, but naysayers have a lot to blabber without understanding.
@Fern, maybe the idea of it being in hospitals is because most of koreans live in tenements or residential complex. maybe a bit cheaper since there’s not much logistics involved. most importantly, waste disposal.
@HK_Lady, donating one’s body for medical education or research isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, yet contemporary medicine and surgery would not be as advanced as it is now if it never happened. Your father is very generous. I worked for a donor programme for a while. I considered the donors to be teachers to medical students and saviours to future patients.
@GMPL, the reasons behind the hospital location of funeral homes in South Korea was a bit complex. As well as the reasons you mentioned, it also involved Confucian and other influences to ensure a smooth transition into the afterlife.
I haven’t watched the video posted above yet so I’m not sure if cremation is mentioned but from what I recall, that’s what most of the kdrama funerals have had. Maybe not??
I am caught up to episode 6 and I’m enjoying the mix of happy and sad. I made it through Tomorrow but very slowly since the suicide aspect made it so depressing. at least these deaths tend to be more bittersweet and the promise of heaven is something to look forward to, while also spending your time on earth wisely.
I also find I’m enjoying the stories that have been added when usually they just seem extraneous and distract from the main OTP.
A few questions/thoughts since I watched quickly and haven’t taken the time to go back through.
What’s the connection between the police officer and the dime a job partners? I’m wondering about his rain story.
The manager is also a character I am intrigued by. I wonder if they’ll try and make his belief or lack of into a storyline. Is that his biological sister?
Tae hee’s mom said his sadness is her karma. I wonder when they will appear.
Dongjoo doesn’t remember him asking about seeing a child but in hoping he brings it up again soon.
Another mislead that I felt was effective was when it seemed like the husband would walk in while she was talking to his deceased wife but it was tae hee—it made me feel surprised along with him.