Whether intentional or not, the Chinese Ministry of Culture is enlightening me on the current dating practices of Chinese couples. If ever there’s a Division on Anti-Lewd Thoughts in the Ministry, its people are doing a good job of reprogramming my Hollywood mindset of a “Sex Scene in Every Episode.”  My *aspirational* goals in a romance have been subtly but effectively reformed thanks to Love O2O.

For instance, when it comes to displays of physical affection, the unhurried pace is desirable. Selecting a handsome actor like Yang Yang to portray Xiao Nai was a brilliant move. Through his gentlemanly manner towards Weiwei, the show was able to promote and popularize the concept of virtuous courtship. When Nai does a slow walk to “first base” starting with the wrist-grab in Episode 11, the right-triangle hug in Episode 14

and now, in Episode 16, the chaste kiss on the forehead,

the female audience, especially the unattached ones, cannot help but wish for a partner like him in real life. Their ideal becomes Xiao Nai.

He’s the perfect antidote to over-sexed heroes like Christian Grey.

Doing it against the wall (hahaha. What did I say, @phoenix???)

Teasing aside, I’m enjoying the simmering approach to romance in this series. If I had a daughter, I would definitely watch this with her.

1. Sulking Nai

When I first watched this episode, I thought there was something wrong with the editing. I didn’t get why Nai insisted on buying platform ticket since nothing came off it. I thought this scene could have been deleted.

However, after rewatching it, I can rationalize its inclusion. Of course, the point here is that he doesn’t want her to leave. He wants her to delay her departure.

But the whole scene magnifies his frustration. He cannot express his wish outright that she delay her departure, so he’s showing his displeasure with actions. He’s being:

sulky (i.e., not initiating the conversation),
silent (i.e., speaking only when spoken to),
grim (i.e., not smiling at her once)
sullen (i.e., ignoring the cactus)
and overbearing (i.e., telling her to take a seat when she clearly said she could manage).

His behavior is uncharacteristic of him because he’s frustrated that she’s leaving but he can’t hold her back. Do you see it? Not once did he tell her to stay another day with him.

Weiwei processes all this and knows for sure that he’s annoyed when he walks back to her an unsmiling face

and even refuses to look at her.

He’s basically doing this –>

Only when she asks him, “Are there still train tickets to Wuhan for tomorrow and the day after?” does he turn around and smile at her.

He quickly takes out his cellphone to check. But his happiness lasts about three seconds — or the time it took him to get connected to the ticketing site. Nai says, “I don’t think so. There are no tickets for the next five days.”

He then looks at her expectantly, “What about a plane ticket for the day after tomorrow?”

But she demurred instantly, “That’s okay.” [Netflix sub] or “Don’t bother. [kissasian sub] And he’s in a snit again.

Here, we have another contentious issue for newly-minted couples.

I think her answer is the right one. He shouldn’t buy her the plane ticket. Remember how I bristled when he made that comment about his wallet in Episode 15?

Erxi: Senior! Look at your Weiwei.
Nai: Who treats guests like this?
Sisi: Senior, now that Weiwei said so, we won’t dare to order any food.
Nai: It’s all right. Weiwei isn’t in charge of my wallet yet.
Xiaoling: We have to eat more now. When Weiwei takes over our senior’s wallet we won’t even get to eat pickles.

To me, her objection to the plane ticket is connected to her indifference to his wallet.  She is NOT in charge of his wallet. She KNOWS she’s not in charge of his wallet. She never WANTED to be in charge of his wallet.

She can’t afford to buy her ticket but more importantly, she can’t “afford” to ASK HIM to pay for it. What’s at stake is her self-sufficiency.

She’s been independent and doesn’t want to feel obligated to him in that way.

Remember her personality online? According to Nini, she never asked for equipment from the boys which made her an oddball among female gamers. She refused any divorce settlement from her ex-husband Zhengshui. She also declined the wedding dowry from Nai until Nai pointed out that it was for their upcoming PK.

That was her character online: she isn’t materialistic; she doesn’t want freebies; she doesn’t want to be indebted to anyone.

In real life, her principled self-reliance is reflected in her financial independence. She felt awkward about going to dinner with her girlfriends and Nai because they were making Nai pay for an expensive meal. She tried to cancel the dinner but Nai didn’t want to back out. So, she attempted to control the amount of food that the girls would order and Nai overheard her and said that bit about the wallet.

And that’s also why she didn’t find it odd that Nai didn’t offer to buy her a cellphone.

Thus, it’s no wonder she’s uncomfortable asking him to pay for the plane ticket.

When it comes down to favors and money, she’s reluctant to ask for them. That’s the boundary she’s placed between them. Nai finally figures HER out.

Weiwei says, “Even if I stay a few more days, I still have to leave. Right?

His reaction:

Weiwei adds, “Anyway, I told my dad I’ll be home this afternoon.”

His reaction:

Then, he says, “Never mind.”

Then, he moves to take her luggage. He extends his hand for her to hold.

This handholding moment is funny. I wish I could gif it. He just sticks out his hand like it was fish bait, and she comes swimming like a guppy.

He’s resigned to the situation. But he really can’t do anything much because she’s going to refuse his offer anyway. So he starts rattling off his instructions. “Call me as soon as you arrive.” “Remember to take your medicine.” “Also replace your phone soon.”

Weiwei promises to get one right away.

2. The goodbye scene

Personally, I dislike goodbye scenes at train stations and airports. I’m the type to say, “Just drop me off  at the curb and I’ll walk in by myself.” The only kind of send-offs that I enjoyed was the one on cruise ships with streamers and confetti (Remember that show, “The Love Boat”??) but they stopped doing this.

Hell, no! 

Back to our story…

At the gate, Weiwei tells him to go but he simply stands there looking at her.

To fill the silence, she adds, “Take care of the cactus.” He stands there like he’s frozen…

or something. lol.

But I got this! I’ve watched too many kdramas not to grasp what his silent gaze means. Nai is soulfully (it must be “soulful” or it doesn’t count) staring at her because he wants to to memorize the way she looks at the moment. This way, he’ll have that picture of her etched on his butt heart to carry him through their two months separation. See how romantic that is? 

She prattles on, “Put it by your office computer. It’s best if you can see it every day.”

I got this, too. Mentally, he’s thinking, “But I’d rather see YOU every day, not your substitute.” And his eyes get all bulgy.

(hahaha. This is NOT just an excuse to take another screenshot of Yang Yang.)

He steps close then and kisses her forehead.

Edited to add this gif:

For a moment there, I thought he was considering whether to kiss her on the lips, too but she didn’t look up.

Ugh! Our couple! Boo…hiss…

He wishes her a safe journey

as his hand – get this – TRAVELS down her arm. Lol. Again, I got this!  I’ve watched too many kdramas to know that the *optics* is supposed to match the words.

credit: xueshanshan’s tumblr

He’s just grazing her but I’m sure a frisson of excitement shot through her.

I know the scene gave me the tingles.

and the goosebumps.

Okay… that’s enough with the gifs. I was having so much fun with this scene. 

3. The cactus

He heads to the office with the cactus dowry, and the guys never pass up the chance to pry on his love life. They ask him where he got it and he wisecracks that if he tells them, the damage will be great. It’s better if they don’t know. In other words, “Ignorance is bliss.”

The guys all pretend to fear his threat. He places the cactus on his desk where he can see it. (Mental note to myself: I’ve to explain his poetry in Episode 17. “Flowers along the paddy field paths have bloomed….” )

4. Reporting in…

As soon as Weiwei’s parents return to work, she calls Nai as she was told. She pinches her nose to pretend that — I don’t know – to pretend to be an anonymous caller? An obscene phone caller? A prankster? lol. But of course, he doesn’t fall for it. Even if he doesn’t recognize the phone number, he knows it’s her.

WW: It’s me.
Nai: (pretending to be displeased so he calls her by her formal name) Ms. Bei, you’ve been home for two hours. You only now remember to call me?

How cute is that? She mimics him. 

WW: Mr. Xiao, my parents only left a minute ago. No! Half a minute ago, then I called you. Okay?
Nai. Oh. That means, Ms. Bei’s parents don’t allow Ms. Bei to date right now.

So smart! He doesn’t miss the important aspect, does he? Her parents don’t want her dating so he has to pretend as if he doesn’t exist. Meanwhile, his parents are well-aware of Weiwei.

On top of that, Weiwei’s mother is gossipy. Weiwei fears being pestered by family and friends if they find out about him. She jokes that, as consequence of family harassment, “you’ll see a very haggard Ms Bei” when next semester comes.

He answers, “I’m looking forward to it.”

Weiwei promptly objects, “You’re looking forward to seeing me HAGGARD?”

He explains that “haggard” is only an adjective and that the subject matter (i.e., Weiwei) is more important. It’s clear to me that he looks forward to seeing Weiwei again in whatever physical attribute she’ll be in: haggard, pretty, refreshed, etc. She tells him to be more plain-spoken.

They flirt on the phone. See? You should have given her that phone, Nai. lol. What would she have done? Toss it back at your face?

She tells him to keep making money for the sake of their little pets. It’ll cost them quite a lot to raise them.

Her mother returns and asks who’s on the phone with her because she has this goofy smile on her face. Spoken like a mom!

She lies and says she’s talking to a pupil. Pretending that Nai is her student, she tells him to study hard during the summer holidays. “Be sure to finish the homework I assigned you on time. Call me if you run into problems. That’s all then. I’ll call you next time.”

Nai takes her subterfuge in stride and he joins in to poke fun at her.

He replies, “Don’t forget to buy a new cell phone, sis. (He calls her sister?? hahaha) I’m worried that I can’t reach you when I have problems with homework.”

After hanging up, Nai saves Weiwei’s number as “Mother-in-law’s house” on his contacts. So smart!

credit: travelingstrawberry’s tumblr

How presumptuous of him! 

5. Long-distance relationship

This is the fun of long-distance relationships nowadays. You’re never really separated as long as you’re connected on the internet.

Later, Weiwei rushes home from her tutoring session, wolfs down dinner with her parent, zips through the dishes and sprints to her room for her online date with Nai.

They’re talking online now, not just texting each other.  The first thing he asks is if her cold has gotten better. He worries that she got wet in the rain as it rained in Wuhan that day. She sneezes right in the middle of her reassurances that she’s feeling much better.

He hears her and fiercely tells commands her to take her medicine. NOW!

Bossy boots! 

To humor him, she breaks the capsule right near the microphone.  She also exaggerates her swallowing so he can hear her.

“Happy now?” she asks. “Yes,” he mumbles.

WW: By the way, Erxi teased me today.
Nai: Why?
WW: She teased me about both of us still chatting through the online game during summer game even after we’ve met up in person. (meaning, they could have been chatting on the phone.)
Nai: Whose fault is that?
WW: Mine. Mine. — No it should be mom’s. She confiscated my scholarship money.
Nai: I wouldn’t dare blame your mom.
WW: You only bully kind people (like her, she means). But I think that it’s nice chatting online. There are mountains, lakes and great scenery. (And she thinks, “And then there’s you.”)

The added advantage of their online communication is that Nai can keep coding programs with the online game on, while she plays the game and levels up for him and their pets. He’s auto-following her.

Her mother knocks on the daughter to hand her that yogurt milk so popular in Asia. (Is it banana flavored? How does it taste like?) She nags Weiwei about spending too much time on the computer. She says, it’ll make her face square and it’s bad for her skin.

Sassily, Weiwei counters mother’s logic. Washing dishes is also bad for her skill so perhaps she shouldn’t wash the dishes anymore. She also jokes that her mom should stop watching her dramas because TVs are square, too. Good one!

She puts on her headphone to return to Nai and their virtual pets. When she asks him what he’s doing he says he’s reading up on dishwashers.

She doesn’t get it, so he explains, “I don’t like to wash dishes either.”

WW: You were eavesdropping on us?
Nai: I don’t mind listening openly.
WW: If the seedling of a revolution is discovered too early, it could be cut off.

To me, she’s teasing him not to make big plans about the future, like buying dishwashers and saving Weiwei’s mother’s contact as “Mother-in-law’s home,” because things can go wrong. The simpler version of this quotation is “Don’t count your chickens before they hatch.”

Nai: Weiwei, you need photosynthesis for a seedling to sprout. A seedling kept in the dark will just become a bean sprout.

He does have a point there. Scientifically speaking, a seedling needs light to grow. And metaphorically speaking, keeping something like a plan for the future secret and hidden (i.e., the “seedlings of the revolution” she mentioned) diminishes its chances of gaining traction.

But his deeper meaning is harder to grasp. To me, he’s referring to his earlier statement that he isn’t “eavesdropping” but listening openly. He’s saying that it’s good to have information like this (i.e., she dislikes washing dishes) out in the open. He likes to listen and know her inner thoughts and feelings (i.e., like she doesn’t want him to buy the ticket) so he can attend to them in broad daylight (where photosynthesis works).

In other words, if she keeps things hidden from him, then he can’t do anything to solve or fix them. Similar to a seedling that’s kept away from the sunlight remains a stunted bean sprout, their relationship won’t grow.

Anyway…that’s how I would have interpreted his comment if I were Weiwei. 

But Weiwei tells him that it’s a lame joke. “Master, you didn’t turn on your air conditioner. That’s such a cold joke. You must have had your cooling system with you.” Then she goes off to tend to their virtual pets.

She tells the baby tigers, “Your dad couldn’t be bothered so I have to take you with me on matches to level up. I have to be mom and dad at the same time. But then, he’s also making money for your sake. You mustn’t dislike him.”

Awwww. Men are really from Mars and women from Venus. For their married life, he’s researching on dishwashers, while she’s pretending to be both mom and dad because he’s busy being the breadwinner of the family.

5. Food for thought

She ask him if he’s eaten dinner and he confesses that he forgot earlier but he’s now hungry.

She secretly orders food to be delivered to him and she asks him if he’s got money. Either he isn’t listening to her or he doesn’t get her question, but his response was “Huh?”

When the food delivery arrives, he doesn’t have small change on him. He goes to knock on his neighbor the dean’s house at night to borrow money.

I thought it was sweet that she ordered food for him… although she made him pay for it himself. It’s the thought that counts.  My husband does this for me, too, when I stay up late in the office (or in a hotel in a new place) because I forget to take a break.

Her mother checks on her again and tells her it’s past 11 pm. She obeys her mom and tells Nai (sneakily) that she was off to bed.

I think she isn’t meant for a life of crime when she becomes all giggly about going behind her mother’s back and keeping Nai a secret part of her life.

That night, they finally stare at the same moon that night. Last time, they stayed up late at night thinking of each other, they were staring at their laptops. Remember? Episode 7, after his accident. I’m happy we have this requisite moon-staring moment.

I got the romantic trope for this imagery. It means no matter how far apart Nai and Weiwei are, they’e still under the same moon, wishing for each other.

Seriously, I’m glad neither one’s a werewolf.